


The Middle Man

by fairmanor



Series: The Campaign: A Series of Vignettes About the Time David and Patrick Secretly Ran Against Each Other in the Council Elections [3]
Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Drabbles, Except they love each other in real life, Fluff, Future Fic, M/M, No angst here, Ronnie Loves Stirring Shit Up, Smut, This is like a political You've Got Mail, Town Council, and hate their mystery candidate, just misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:53:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24895717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fairmanor/pseuds/fairmanor
Summary: It’s election season in Schitt’s Creek. And this year, there’s more than one member of the Rose-Brewer household dealing with a…familiar rival.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Series: The Campaign: A Series of Vignettes About the Time David and Patrick Secretly Ran Against Each Other in the Council Elections [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1791547
Comments: 3
Kudos: 29





	The Middle Man

**Author's Note:**

> This is the third instalment in a series! If you've landed on this fic randomly, make sure to read the previous two works first :)
> 
> The idea came from a wonderful prompt by @onwardandawesomer. so props to them!

While David and Patrick are both completely aware, it is unbeknownst to David-and-Patrick that Ronnie is advising both of them on how to successfully campaign without drawing the attention of the other. Thankfully, she had managed to scrape together a couple more decent applications (including Ray, since his quantity overpowered and she simply couldn’t ignore him any longer) from Twyla, Gwen and…Herb Ertlinger? _Bizarre, but beggars can’t be choosers_.

There’ll be no short supply of flyers and slogans stuck in lawns, so she’s hoping her boys ( _get a grip, Ronnie_ ), will blend into the background.

She convinces both of them to front their campaigns through regular email circles. Ronnie Googles ‘is it illegal to use pseudonyms in a political campaign?’, then decides _fuck it_ and sets Derek Russell and Peter Bennett – complete with fake email addresses – free into the lawless wasteland of Schitt’s Creek politics.

*

If all of this had been happening two months ago, David would have definitely spent Thanksgiving being grateful for his and Patrick’s no-business-talk-in-the-bedroom policy. David had figured out that his husband must have some Pavlovian reaction to corporate buzzwords after he’d accidentally said ‘interest’ once during sex and had to deal with Patrick fretting about their quarterlies until 4am after he couldn’t keep it up. It was silently assumed that this pact extended to politics, and with both handling secret campaigns they were even more careful not to let anything slip.

David comes dangerously close, however, when an email pings through on his laptop at 11:30pm. Some _Peter Bennett_ , a man he’s never heard of, has made an admittedly concise use of the town’s email circle to convey the bulk of his policies and the understated nature of his campaign.

Some Peter Bennett has stolen his fucking idea.

*

Downstairs, Patrick hits ‘Send’ on the communal email, still seething. The little swooshing sound as the mail is sent isn’t as satisfying as he would have liked.

He clicks back into his own inbox to read the offending message again. Three hours ago, some Derek Russell, a man he’s never heard of, plagued his feed with a long-winded explanation about his bid to be on town council and how his choice to concentrate most of his self-promotion into emails would be a more “low-key” ( _seriously?_ Patrick thinks) approach to his campaign.

Some Derek Russell stole his fucking idea. And he’s going to take it back.


End file.
